Everything I do has a purpose behind it. Every decision I make is the right one for me. If even just for the moment I am living in, I make the choice I feel will be the best for me. Some people I know tell me to "pray on it." Some tell me to weigh the pro's and con's. I can totally appreciate that this is the way they need to look at big life decisions in order to feel comfortable with their choices. I totally support it.
That being said: I do things a little different. Yes I weigh pros and cons. BUT I don't look at them too long. I approach any decision I have to make like it's a question on the ACT/SAT. I look at it once, give it the attention it needs, answer it, and move on. I never go back and second guess myself. I also tend to make my decisions immediately and instantaneously.
It's been that way my whole life. Even when I was little I would do that. In middle school I would put together speeches for competitions with maybe a day or two to write and learn them. I even signed up for the Children's Classic in 6th grade with about 10 minutes to prep. Then, as I grew up and the choices became a little more dramatic and indicative of where my life would eventually lead and end up, well the process I took stayed the same. I knew I wasn't an athlete so I joined the newspaper and yearbook staff. Went to undergrad to study that, but there was a pivotal moment when we had to write a paper on why we wanted to be in photojournalism and I just realized I didn't want to anymore. I realized that I loved my job more than my degree: I would work my shifts, pick up more shifts, hang out at the fields before and after...even my closest friends were those I made at my job. In the few hours after I was assigned the paper, I walked up to the Recreation Department Head and told him I wanted to change my major. Just like that!
I took every job I've ever had with no more than a few hours consideration. And now it may be time to do it again. I know where I am now is not where I plan to be when I retire. It's a great job, but I feel like there's something...something missing. In every other job there was a camaraderie. A sense that we were all on the same team, trying to achieve the same goal. We wanted the best for everyone. At the place I work now, there's a sense of competition: trying to get YOUR doctor's schedule filled. Trying to get YOUR claims sent out before everyone else. Trying to collect more money than anyone else. All these things are necessary; I understand that. But I really miss what I used to have.
So now I'm taking steps to achieve the next goal I've set for myself. I'm making sure I get and stay healthy. I'm working out. I'm eating better (I haven't hit up the Popeye's next to my office for food in like two whole weeks!). I'm talking to people in the field I want to get into. I'm TRYING to get my foot in the door.
I'm not going to say anything too specific because there's still just so much on my plate to get in order before I can even truly and honestly think about it, but I'm very proud of the choices I've already made. Let's just end with this: Pride and Honor are the most important things to me. Where-ever I end up, I will make sure I abide by those.
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